Everyone experiences loss or bereavement at some point in their life. However, the way you react will be unique to you, as there’s no ‘right’ way to grieve. Having said that, there are some common experiences that other people will have shared and knowing this can be helpful. For example, many people talk about feeling numb, in shock or overwhelmed, making every-day tasks feel like a challenge. Some people cope by immersing themselves in work, while others find it difficult to function at all. It’s also common to feel emotions such as anger, disbelief, guilt, or profound sadness. And the pain of grief can affect you physically, making it difficult to sleep, eat or even think straight. You need to know that it’s alright to have any of these feelings, whatever other people may say. It’s also important to understand that there’s no time limit on recovery. You won’t feel better all at once, but it will start to get easier as time goes on.
Everyone experiences loss or bereavement at some point in their life. However, the way you react will be unique to you, as there’s no ‘right’ way to grieve. Having said that, there are some common experiences that other people will have shared and knowing this can be helpful. For example, many people talk about feeling numb, in shock or overwhelmed, making every-day tasks feel like a challenge. Some people cope by immersing themselves in work, while others find it difficult to function at all. It’s also common to feel emotions such as anger, disbelief, guilt, or profound sadness. And the pain of grief can affect you physically, making it difficult to sleep, eat or even think straight. You need to know that it’s alright to have any of these feelings, whatever other people may say. It’s also important to understand that there’s no time limit on recovery. You won’t feel better all at once, but it will start to get easier as time goes on.
Whatever the cause of your grief, there’s no right or wrong way to cope. It’s common to feel that you’re struggling more than you should be, or that you’re taking longer to heal than you should do. However, there’s no timeline or deadline when you’re coping with loss.
Losing a loved one is hard at any time. Bereavement and grief during a period of isolation, filled with restrictions and limited contact with family and friends can make coping with loss much harder.
It can be difficult to know what to say or do when your loved one is coping with loss and bereavement. It’s normal to feel awkward or to worry that you’ll make things worse, but…
Most people are unsure what to say when someone’s been bereaved and sometimes this can feel overwhelming if you’re trying to support a friend or family member through their loss. You might feel worried about…
Complicated grief is when the grieving process doesn’t move forward. You may feel stuck, find that you’re unable to feel sad or to cry, or you may feel so sad that it’s hard to manage your day-to-day life.
We all experience changes in our lives. Learn about how change can affect our wellbeing.
This resource contains information about coping with grief during Covid. It includes information on how managing grief can relate to changes in behaviours and feelings. You can access the PDF of this resource here
Remember that everyone has different needs, so what’s right for one person might not be right for another. Having said that, here are a few suggestions that might help you cope with difficult feelings around change, loss and bereavement
This self-help guide prepared by NHS inform aims to help you understand the experience of grief, cope with the effects of grief, and decide if you need further help. The guide includes activities and…
This app focuses on managing grief: Apart of me The app is aimed at young people aged 11 and above, who are coping with the loss of a parent or loved one to a…
Listening to other people share their experiences can be a good way to make sense of your own grief. Here are some podcasts that might help:
An exercise in helping you find a balance in life and actively putting those positive activities back into your life.
We all have to cope and manage with change in our lives for lots of reasons. Here are some tips and thoughts on navigating through a period of change.
If you feel tense a lot of the time, you can try learning some relaxation skills, as these should be helpful.
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is a psychological therapy based on the relationships between what we think, what we do and how we feel. CBT teaches you how to recognise and tackle problems in the here and now, rather than in the past.
With support from the people in your life and maybe with a little help from other sources, such as the resources on this website, you’ll most likely find ways to cope with your loss and move forward.
However, grief takes time - usually much longer than you expect and certainly longer than many of the people around you expect. However, if you’re worried about the way that you’re coping, or if you have concerns about your mental health more generally and need further support, please get in touch with your GP in the first instance.
See the Lothian Health and Social Care partnership’s sites for locally available support:
The ‘iThrive’ website focuses on support available Edinburgh wide – search for what local support is available to meet your needs here
‘midspace’ is Midlothian’s online source of mental health and wellbeing information – search for what local support is available to meet your needs here
‘eastspace’ is East Lothian’s online source of mental health and wellbeing information – search for what local support is available to meet your needs here
‘westspace’ is West Lothian’s online source of mental health and wellbeing information – search for what local support is available to meet your needs here
The following National organisations specifically focus on loss and bereavement and may also be helpful:
Most of the organisations below are able to provide support relating to loss during the Covid-19 pandemic. Contact them or look at their website to find out more.
If you, or someone you know, is in crisis and in imminent danger of causing harm to themselves or others, call 999 immediately
